Navratri
2014 with Gurudev – October 2nd, 2014
Just back from the Bangalore Ashram and wanted to share my experiences during Navratri over the past ten days…
Here's a picture attached of our mini-reunion when I bumped into my TTC Buddy on the way to the AOL Spinal Care course! Note that Nitin Ji didn't even ask if he could have some of my Coconut hair oil ;-)
I
was about to leave campus, Sri Sri University, on September 23rd 2014, and was
frustrated by the lack of structure and detail in our MA program course
syllabus. I composed an email to our senior AOL faculty regarding an
ambiguous syllabus for our yoga program's first semester; and then headed to
the airport in our infamous Kalu Bhaya's rickshaw service. Surprisingly,
I was charged a reasonable 350 RS for the trip from campus to Bhubaneswar
airport.
I
was tired after days of barely sleeping next door to a loud campus Vishala Cafe
and many nights of telling our young students to be quiet at 2:30am or 3:30am
in the morning. I can only empathize with their immaturity as I, twenty
years ago, at their age, would sometimes wake up drunk / hung-over somewhere on
campus in the US at that hour. So glad we at least have an alcohol-free
and vegetarian sattvic campus.
So
on to the airport I went, feeling spoiled by the fact that I was flying to
Bangalore while many of our students were making a 24+ hour journey to the
Bangalore Ashram via trains and buses. I told myself I would make the
journey next time with our students - Sangachhadhwam - meaning let's move
together.
So
on I went...I arrived at the Bangalore Ashram right around 7pm, just in time
for Satsang. Instead of checking in, I ran upstairs, dropped off my
backpack in my dear friend, Arie's office, and headed to Satsang to see my
beloved Gurudev. I arrived just in time to see my beloved. I could
feel the sattva rising, the happiness within, and the feeling of rejoicing with
my master...a feeling that must be felt by a baby when held by a mother.
Getting a smile from Gurudev is for me what breast-milk is to a baby. I
felt completely nourished and so fulfilled by just being in the same space.
After
Satsang, I checked in and got settled into my room. I remember feeling
uncomfortable just a year ago when I was at the ashram Aparna residence hall
for Sri Sri Yoga Teacher Training Course. Now, though, I was fine and
happy to be home again. I was surprised by my shift from my
"American" standard of living to the freedom associated with no
longer needing an umbrella in the rain, a cap in the sun, or hot water / even a
shower head in my room. Though all of this is available at the ashram, I
no longer desired / wanted / needed any of these things. I am reminded of
a beautiful story in the book, Living with the Himalayan Masters...I'll share
more when I get another copy of the book.
The
next day we started our Navratri Silence course for teachers with Swamiji
Bhramatej in Maitri Hall. We were packed in like sardines and I barely
had space for Ardha Matsyendrasana. I was aching from my postural
scoliosis and could not really meditate that day. I decided to opt for
the Vishalakshi Mantap (often referred to as the VM building) silence course
for English speakers. The next day was amazing as I had a chair and two
cushions. I wasn't sure if I meditated / slept the second day, but I was
happy nonetheless.
I
spent the first few days in silence wondering about moving from "what
about me and I, me, or my" to selfless service and the infinite
consciousness. As I write, I still find the prevalent "I" but
realize that this self(ish) ego can be quieter as more and more sadhana, satsang,
and selfless service / seva is realized. How can we shift to we / us vs.
me / my? I think the key is belongingness and realising that
"I" belong to you & "you" are my Art of Living family,
my biological family, my Sri Sri University family, and my human
family. When I think about my spiritual master, I think about how
he feels belongingness with the whole world and about how all he wants to do is
selflessly serve people and uplift humanity.
By
day five of the silence course, I didn't want to come out of silence and was
craving another 5 days of silence. I wonder how 3 weeks of silence with
hollow and empty meditations would be...one of these days we’ll hopefully offer
a three week silence course program!
We
started day six with amazing Poojas and Homas. I decided that no matter
the cost, I would take all Sankalpas. I was elated to be in every
Sankalpa and also registered for the Spine Care course. I still found
sitting in Sukhasana for hours painful, but found myself going into deep
meditations / samadhi. These Poojas & Homas are so powerful, that
even a beginner meditator can drop into a deep state of meditation in the field
of sattva / consciousness created by the Vedic Sanskrit chantings. I feel
like these chantings encompass all religions. I wonder if this amazing
experience is how a Christian might feel in church prayers on Christmas Day / a
Buddhist at a monastery sitting close to their master, a Muslim in a mosque on
the last day of Ramadan, or even an Atheist maybe in nature at the top of Mount
Everest. My sister, an attorney, philosopher and atheist, has taken the
Art of Living Happiness program and loved it. I think she finds some of
her greater moments of happiness on Lake Austin either boating / swimming in
the lake. It's amazing to see how quiet my little niece and nephew get
when they are boating on Lake Austin...I love them dearly.
By
the last day, day ten, I was tired from only sleeping five hours / night and
having a sore back from sitting for hours each day. We had a group
breakout session for the internationals that Oct 2nd evening and I was half
wanting to skip...I was exhausted from the go-go-go schedule of large group
activities all day. Earlier that day, I hit the onsite Internet cafe and
emailed my nephew in Bangalore. I craved seeing my nephew and
cousin-brother and felt relieved at leaving the ashram for a few hours. I
wondered if I was restless / simply wanted to spend some time within my comfort
zone as an introvert with just one or two other people vs. ten thousand...so I
finalized plans and headed off to Jayanagar, a nearby suburb of
Bangalore.
Then
it happened...we had a group breakout session for internationals at 5:30pm and
I had a chance to lock eyes with Gurudev and get a smile from him. That
one look made me feel like I had slept for days and had the energy of a
thousand elephants...well, maybe one really strong and happy elephant. I
was elated at having the chance to personally hand over a written letter to him
from one of my dear classmates. After our group session with Gurudev, I
started walking outside and was grabbed by two of our Sri Sri University
students. They said, wait here, Gurudev's coming. They said to tell
Gurudev we are from Sri Sri University and I agreed hoping to get Gurudev's
attention AGAIN! I couldn't believe it...he saw me and I said “Gurudev,
here's the Sri Sri University group” and he said, so lovingly,
"ohhh." I love it when he says "ohhh" with so much
love. He then asked me, "are you happy?" And I said "yes,
very happy Gurudev." I was so happy that I grabbed my fellow
classmates and we hugged like we had just beat Pakistan in the world cup
finals. We then proceeded to walk with Gurudev for a little while before
he literally took off like a rocket for the massive Satsang awaiting his
arrival at 6:30pm or so. I had never seen Gurudev move so quickly and was
awed at how diverse we see our beloved...as still as Kapha can be and as
dynamic as Milkha (reference to an amazing Hindi movie).
So
off I went to return to the worldly life of seeing my family as I headed away
from our heavenly ashram.
Longing
to see my beloved again soon...may we aspire to be the unconditional love he
lives by. May we lift the Tamas & Rajas and leave each other in pure
Sattva as he leaves us back to our worldly ways to share this joy with others.
In
deep gratitude…may I meet you and give unconditional love. As Gurudev
says, may we give and give and give and give love...may love blossom and
manifest from within our higher self or the big mind. May we be his
instrument for the music of healing and unconditional divine love.
Love & Jai Guru Dev,
An Aspiring Yogi
